Let’s call my son Johnny. He has a neurological impairment and is ambulatory and impressively articulate. These are my views and perceptions as his mother. I hope the points that I will highlight will resonate with readers. I also hope that some of you will be motivated and proactive in not only making a transition plan but making that plan a reality that is sustainable and seek guardianship, before your child reaches the age of majority if appropriate.

My Story

We live in a great school district in Westchester County.   My son had had a number of medical interventions and we had a relatively sound understanding of our challenges.   Yes, we all know that each child is different and has different needs. My son moved up in grades, followed the Regents track, though he was always in special education classes.

In high school, it all came crashing down and it became apparent to everyone that a Regents diploma was not going to become a reality (for him).

Despite the fact that he had a transition plan and even a transition coordinator set in place in our district, Johnny was no longer interested. As of 11^th grade, my son did not want to go to school anymore, thinking it was a huge waste of his time. His CSE agreed that if he didn’t want to attend school there was no way to force him. At that juncture and to my dismay, he was over 18, guardian- less, and therefore emancipated and able legally to make his own decisions about life. Legally, I learned that few options exist for parents to exercise control and supervision over a child after he or she turns 18, whether a child is in school or not.   Johnny had not, in the true legal sense of the word, transitioned out of school nor had he transitioned into anything else.

He became more and more out of sync with so many and so much. I watched him, helplessly, as he sat around, slept, played video games, watched TV and frequented CVS to buy candy. This went on for over two years.

I tried many different courses of action: I called adult protective services, the police, the pediatrician, and the neurologist. I cried to friends and family members. I even called Mental Health Association (MHA), who told me in writing that if Johnny wasn’t a threat to himself or to others, they could not do a thing to help me.

What was my problem? My child, a young adult now, was sinking: disengaged, with challenges no meaningful pursuits and no high school degree. My other children, Johnny’s siblings, were progressing.   We all felt aggrieved, irritated, frustrated and distressed.

I could find no one, nowhere, no how to help me and Johnny!

There were a number of contributing factors to our rough patch:

1. In as much as he was motivated, he always felt as if he had been pulled down. He was never fully accepting of his own challenges albeit he was extremely knowledgeable of his interventions.

2. I (his mother), had not fully understood that money cannot buy a young adult with a disability services.

3. All of the professionals who had worked with my son had always seen my son as ‘on the fence’; he straddled two worlds; mainstream but not, non-mainstream yet so articulate and able.

Finally, it was made clear to me that the only one who could help my son…was me. I asked myself over and over, “What is appropriate for my son?”

The convergence of these factors made the later years of high school and post-high school a living disaster. I realized that the only way to access county, state and federal services was for him to be in the system and that was a scary thought for me to grasp.

I made one and only one resolution that year: I was going to move my son to a ‘better place’. I didn’t have an idea what exactly that meant nor did I know what that would look like but I committed to knowing for a fact that the status quo absolutely was not working: not for him, me, or the rest of the family.

Since no agency could help, it had to be me. I had the power because Johnny lived in my house with me – otherwise, I realized, I would have had no legal authority over him.

Johnny already had his OPWDD eligibility. I visited Social Security, ACCES VR, and interviewed Medicaid service coordinators (MSC).   For the record: if you are NOT happy with your MSC you can and SHOULD change them. There is absolutely no reason for you to stay with someone who is not helping you/ your child.

8 months later… Everything is in place!

Johnny has a new Medicaid service coordinator, who has visited my son numerous times (over the course of just six weeks)! I rented an apartment less than one mile from my house for one year. Johnny is set up there. I buy his groceries; he comes with me, is engaged and helpful. He even washes his sheets – I couldn’t get him to ‘allow’ me to clean his sheets when he lived at home, but now, we are learning how to do laundry and have washed his new sheets. Life is good. Johnny is 1000% more engaged in his life, I am happier, his siblings experience calmness in their home, ACCESS VR is helping Johnny find a job and our MSC is on the case!

What to learn from my experiences:

1. You can ask 100 people their opinion regarding your child but only you can change the status quo.
2. Don’t be afraid — Change is good!
3. We need to organize our kids’ lives so that when we are not around their life can continue and flourish!

If I could impart one piece of advice based on this experience and my knowledge: Sort out a transition plan for your child before he or she reaches the age of majority and seek guardianship, if appropriate. The age of majority is legally 18 in New York; regardless of whether your child has a disability or not.Take these steps before he/she exits high school. Contrary to popular belief, these two moments in time are not necessarily the same as your child may be entitled to exit high school at 21 years of age.

Learn more about our transition planning services by visiting www.specialneedsnewyork.com.

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One such scam involves someone from the Far East with a thick accent placing a call to a consumer who might be in debt to a credit card company or some other lending institution.  The caller knows the name of the creditor, the amount of the balance, as well as information about the consumer.  All of this could have been accessed from the personal information such as name, address, and social security number which might allow someone to pull a credit report to determine the names of the consumer’s creditors.  The consumer is advised that they have a debt of some amount, perhaps near $10,000 to a particular creditor, but the caller claims to be a lawyer from Washington, D.C., or some other metropolitan area.  The phone number they are calling from will have an area code that matches the city they claim to be calling from.  This is a masking technique that anyone can produce using certain telephone vendors.  Anyone can purchase a Washington, D.C., area code and mask their calls as coming from that number .  In essence, someone from India could be calling you, appearing to be calling from Washington, D.C.  In some instances, the caller claims to be Attorney Michael Shaw from Washington, D.C. from the phone number 202-239-6225.

This “lawyer” will then tell the consumer that they may settle their debt for $900.  They are instructed to purchase a Green Dot money card from Walgreens, CVS, Wal-Mart or perhaps other vendors who sell these Green Dot credit cards.  The consumer is then advised to load money onto that card, and then call the “lawyer” from Washington, D.C., with the pin number of that Green Dot card so that the “lawyer” can access the $900 on the card for purposes of settling the debt.

Once the consumer gives the pin number to the “lawyer,” the scam artist from overseas will withdraw everything off the card.  For instance, if the consumer puts $2,000 on the Green Dot card but only authorizes the “lawyer” to take $900, the scam artist will withdraw the entire $2,000 amount.

The overseas scam artist will then call the consumer back and tell them that the settlement has now been declined, and that the consumer will be receiving a $900 refund in the mail.  A day later, the consumer will be called again by this same individual who will tell the consumer that the settlement has now been “approved” and they need to redo the transaction because the refund check has already been issued.  This time the scammer will tell the consumer that there is an additional $200 document fee, and so they will need to withdraw $1,100.  This process will repeat itself as many times as the consumer will allow it with different stories and excuses for why refunds will be issued and why new charges need to be taken from the Green Dot card.  Needless to say, no refund checks are ever sent, and some consumers have been known to lose over $5,000 by the various transactions conducted through this scheme.  In some instances, the consumer may be threatened by the caller, claiming that they will be turned over to the police with a warrant issued for their arrest for not paying their bills. The more the consumer protests, the more aggressive the threats become. In some instances the caller may call dozens of times everyday, harassing the consumer, without any threat of recourse due to his offshore location.  The best strategy is to screen your calls and do not engage this person at all. His attention will soon go to other potential victims if his calls are not being taken.

There are likely several variations of this scam, and consumers, particularly those in debt whose personal information may have been accessed through Target last month, need to be aware of these types of transactions.  In summary, consumers should be very cautious about engaging in any wire transfers, Green Dot transactions, or credit card transactions where debts are offering to be settled.  In addition, personal checks, money orders, and cashier’s checks can easily be counterfeited, and should not be relied upon by a consumer.  If ever you need to contact a creditor, or have been contacted by a creditor for purposes of settling a debt, the best approach is to get everything in writing with signed settlement documents and agreements prior to sending any funds.  Seeking attorney representation in this instance is always a good idea.

One such scam involves someone from the Far East with a thick accent placing a call to a consumer who might be in debt to a credit card company or some other lending institution.  The caller knows the name of the creditor, the amount of the balance, as well as information about the consumer.  All of this could have been accessed from the personal information such as name, address, and social security number which might allow someone to pull a credit report to determine the names of the consumer’s creditors.  The consumer is advised that they have a debt of some amount, perhaps near $10,000 to a particular creditor, but the caller claims to be a lawyer from Washington, D.C., or some other metropolitan area.  The phone number they are calling from will have an area code that matches the city they claim to be calling from.  This is a masking technique that anyone can produce using certain telephone vendors.  Anyone can purchase a Washington, D.C., area code and mask their calls as coming from that number .  In essence, someone from India could be calling you, appearing to be calling from Washington, D.C.  In some instances, the caller claims to be Attorney Michael Shaw from Washington, D.C. from the phone number 202-239-6225.

This “lawyer” will then tell the consumer that they may settle their debt for $900.  They are instructed to purchase a Green Dot money card from Walgreens, CVS, Wal-Mart or perhaps other vendors who sell these Green Dot credit cards.  The consumer is then advised to load money onto that card, and then call the “lawyer” from Washington, D.C., with the pin number of that Green Dot card so that the “lawyer” can access the $900 on the card for purposes of settling the debt.

Once the consumer gives the pin number to the “lawyer,” the scam artist from overseas will withdraw everything off the card.  For instance, if the consumer puts $2,000 on the Green Dot card but only authorizes the “lawyer” to take $900, the scam artist will withdraw the entire $2,000 amount.

The overseas scam artist will then call the consumer back and tell them that the settlement has now been declined, and that the consumer will be receiving a $900 refund in the mail.  A day later, the consumer will be called again by this same individual who will tell the consumer that the settlement has now been “approved” and they need to redo the transaction because the refund check has already been issued.  This time the scammer will tell the consumer that there is an additional $200 document fee, and so they will need to withdraw $1,100.  This process will repeat itself as many times as the consumer will allow it with different stories and excuses for why refunds will be issued and why new charges need to be taken from the Green Dot card.  Needless to say, no refund checks are ever sent, and some consumers have been known to lose over $5,000 by the various transactions conducted through this scheme.  In some instances, the consumer may be threatened by the caller, claiming that they will be turned over to the police with a warrant issued for their arrest for not paying their bills. The more the consumer protests, the more aggressive the threats become. In some instances the caller may call dozens of times everyday, harassing the consumer, without any threat of recourse due to his offshore location.  The best strategy is to screen your calls and do not engage this person at all. His attention will soon go to other potential victims if his calls are not being taken.

There are likely several variations of this scam, and consumers, particularly those in debt whose personal information may have been accessed through Target last month, need to be aware of these types of transactions.  In summary, consumers should be very cautious about engaging in any wire transfers, Green Dot transactions, or credit card transactions where debts are offering to be settled.  In addition, personal checks, money orders, and cashier’s checks can easily be counterfeited, and should not be relied upon by a consumer.  If ever you need to contact a creditor, or have been contacted by a creditor for purposes of settling a debt, the best approach is to get everything in writing with signed settlement documents and agreements prior to sending any funds.  Seeking attorney representation in this instance is always a good idea.