The Spendthrifts Were Uninsured

Four of the estimated forty-seven million uninsured Americans comprised this quartet. “Perhaps there are others hiding behind their profligate ways,” asserts California health insurance agent, Matt Lockard.

Chauncey McBride earned $75K per year as a top salesman for an Oxnard-based copy machine chain. His attractive fiancée Irene earned almost as much from the Thousand Oaks bagel shop she owned. Their friends Rick and Brianca each earned six figures as rising attorneys specializing in Elderly Law. On Tuesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays they’d dress to the max and “do lunch” at Diamond Jim’s, where a lamb chop swimming in mint gravy cost fifty bucks. Irene and Brianca liked to wear designer jewelry; earrings, broaches, even anklets if the truth be known. Chauncey and Rick looked liked the male models gracing the pages of GQ. One night, these four successful twenty-somethings chanced to meet an acquaintance of their parents, Matt Lockard – successful in his own right as a California health insurance agent. The restaurant’s owner was a sensible man, even if he catered to expensive tastes.

“Howdy Jim,” Matt said, “I brought over that change in your policy you wanted.”

“Howdy Matt,” said Diamond Jim, “We’re still busy from the lunch crowd. Why don’t you take a seat next to those two couples waiting for a table? It’ll just be a few minutes.”

“Okay,” Matt said, sitting down alongside Rick and Brianca. He sat still for a few seconds, until he was recognized.

“Hey,” said Brianca, “I know you. We all know you. You’re Matt Lockard.”

“Still shilling health insurance?” asked Chauncey, with his slightly abrasive tone.

“Yeah,” echoed the others, their voices merging in a kind of yuppie meld, “you’re that health insurance guy.”

Matt had been put off guard, but he soon recovered. “Do any of you have health insurance?” he said. It was then that he discovered their secret. None of them did. “Why don’t you?” Matt asked, nobly taking the offensive.

“We can’t afford it,” came the trill of a quartet harmonious only in their will to remain oblivious. Matt knew that a low cost policy would probably cost each of them less than the price of their lunch. But he was tactful to the last. “Oh,” Matt said.

Diamond Jim intervened, ending an uncomfortable tension. “Come into my office Matt.”

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